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      • ...and another thing...
        01/31/07
        "Mom, which symbol is GIRLS"

        "What?"

        "Is is the one with the circle and two lines or the one with the circle and the arrow?"

        "Well, think of it this way-boys have a pointer. Girls don't."

        "Mom, you're

      • Internet savvy looks GOOOOD on a resume
        01/31/07
        You're in your best outfit. Dressed to the nines with matching jewelry and briefcase. You are ALL about takin care of bi'niss with that scorchin resume in-hand.

        In the interview, you've got them eating out of the palm of your hand. You answer every question perfectly, keep

      • American SNIDE'ol
        01/30/07
        I can see my sparkling clean living and dining room from where I sit in my filthy can't-see-the-floor bedroom. I spent my entire day today doing laundry and scrub scrub SCRUBBING my living room floor-edge to edge, corner to corner, behind and under everthing.

        You might be asking you

      • Totally PEE'vd
        01/29/07
        I smell urine. I smell LIKE urine. I can smell urine everywhere I look and everywhere I turn. Thankfully, it's probably just me, because I believe I have finally cleaned the last of the urine I found today. Unless you count what has permanently fixed itself to my person. I hope I don't mee

      • He has crossed over to the dark side
        01/28/07
        As we speak, HH (hot hubby) is refining and perfecting that which will be his very own BLOG!! I say this with great excitement, mostly because, due to the nature of his blog, it represents no threat to mine at all. Witty and charming as he is, most of my readers will not want to know much about mana

      • There goes my chances for gettin me some tonight
        01/27/07
        In the background, a cat squeals in pain

        "Stop that..." says the dad

        "I didn't do anything!" says the boy

        "Listen, I'm not stupid. I've been on this world for 41 years, and I know what it sounds like when a cat is being hurt&

      • Spirtual Growth is not a Team Sport
        01/27/07
        This weekend (so far) has been both amazing, and heartbreaking.

        I expect that those who do not share my faith might not relate, but bear with me. We can all stand to learn a thing or two (or five) about each other.

        I went to a worship seminar this weekend. What this means to t

      • Trees lovely trees and scraped knees
        01/27/07
        My brief post this evening (morning) is to fulfill a promise to post my beautiful pictures.

        First, my photos of a lovely tree in the library parking lot with a very interesting few rays of light hitting it JUST so.







        Next, the explanati

      • Fiber WHAT? Not just for breakfast anymore.
        01/25/07
        Fibromyalgia is not only a big word, but a beast of a disorder. Most folks, when they hear the word wrinkle their brow and say “What’s that?”. Some say “Oh I know a lady who has that…it’s miserable”..then there are those who say “You should try x y and z because it’s a cure. I know it is. Ten people

      • Hijacked
        01/25/07
        Well kind of. The husband sweeps in for a small attack. Since my wife so kindly plastered my face on her blog I thought I would return the favor. After all I have braggin rights about the most beautiful woman in the world. If she has not mentioned it before she is a talented singing artist and im a

      • My husband's duality
        01/25/07


        Which is my husband? Can you tell?

        Indeed, they must have been separated at birth. Remarkable!

      • Is My Son Depressed? An introspective...
        01/24/07
        I have some lovely photos to show you all, but I still have to figure out Flikr and make it happen. Then your eyes can be bombarded by my below-amateur photography on a daily basis. Oh joy.

        On to my son, for this is certain to be the most embarassing post I have ever forwarded to his e

      • TSM gets political
        01/23/07
        We are watching "Red Dawn". Remember that movie from the 80s? It stars Patrick Swayze (along with his Dirty Dancing co-star Jennifer Grey), Charlie Sheen and C. Thomas Howell, the hottest stars in the 80s. Too cool for neon. Basically it begins with a classroom learning about history when

      • Aforementioned stoves, both new and old
        01/22/07
        Old stove...



        Meet your replacement:



        WOOHOOO!!
        Technorati Profile

      • Cook-tops and cavities (or vice versa)
        01/22/07
        In what will finally make me a front-runner for that sought-after Mother of the Year award, today we brought our adorable 9 year old daughter in to the dentist to fill what a few months ago (when a GOOD mother would have had it fixed) was a mere cavity, but now is the Grand Canyon of cavities, and e

      • He ain't sleazy, he's my brother
        01/21/07
        Sleazy man in my previous post has requested that I de-sleazify him verbally, so he can redeem himself in the eyes of my many many readers. Apparently he cannot handle his new-found fame. We shall now call him the Hit Man. He thinks that sounds "cool". I think it's a perfect nickname.

      • I'm narcissistic
        01/20/07
        I've spent all day thinking about...well, ME...and have decided I'm rather self-involved. You might say no more than the average human being, being HUMAN and all, but I beg to differ. It's similar to the time I was pondering my crappiness, and how my crappiness was so much crappier t

      • Yet another dialog involving my 15 year old
        01/19/07
        "Hey, Mike...do me a favor"
        "It depends"
        "Grab that big fold-up foam chair thing and throw it up in the storage, please"
        "Can I just take it out front and set it on fire?"

        Yes, Mike. Please do that. Also, please sign this form relievi

      • AAAAARRRRGGGHHHH!!!!!!
        01/19/07
        Mother, frantically typing at the keyboard trying to finish her evening blog

        "Don't throw that there...I'm trying to clean here!"
        "But that's where it GOES!"
        "NO! DON'T LEAVE IT THERE or I'll KILL you!"
        Mother lifts

      • 120 pound dog versus 220 pound man-and the winner is...
        01/18/07
        Picture this:

        Our large, 120 pound dog wanders into our bedroom from the kitchen, looking guilty. Just then we realize the obvious: she's been in the trash. We can hear her crunching the chicken bones (there we go, rousing the animal cruelty people again), she's already got her

      • Confessions
        01/17/07
        I have a confession to make: I listen to Air Supply.

        Not only do I listen to them, but I will sometimes sit alone at my computer with song after song...Air Supply, Journey, Toto, and now add to the list Nickelback (Photograph)...all those songs that pull at my gut and make me both happy

      • Not another blog about my dinner
        01/16/07
        At first thought, I was going to talk about my lovely meal of Taco Bell and spiked Baja Blast following an exhausting trip to town through slush-covered streets to find the P-e-r-f-e-c-t pair of jeans for a 13 year old (who is somewhere between a 12 and 14, and for which there are no jeans made in

      • Valuable lessons learned today
        01/15/07
        Please note: Upon attempting to post this blog on MySpace for the 5,382, 382nd time, I was met with this message:

        Blogs are currently disabled for special maintenance. They will be available again in about 20 minutes.
        Sorry for the inconvenience...1/15/2007

        Yes, than

      • Fajitas and memories
        01/14/07
        Tonight was fajita night at the Mort house. No, we don't do it weekly, but we should. Dinner was amazing , if I do say so myself, and the company was spectacular. After eating far too much (as usual) and watching the children scramble for what was left, we began talking about memories. Each of

      • Margaritas and memories
        01/13/07
        There comes a time in all our lives when, during an inexplicable moment, we find ourselves thinking of the past with a sad longing, whilst typing in long-forgotten names from high school in the MySpace search engine (or google). What was her last name? Surely it has changed by now...well unless she

      • What did the snowman ever do to YOU?
        01/12/07
        My lanky (but pretty BUFF for his age!) 15 year old, irritated at his sisters for taking too much time in our one bathroom, walks outside on the way to the bus stop, looks right in my 9 year old's eyes, and roundhouse kicks the snowman she spent four hours on yesterday. His top 2 layers fall to

      • Pot roast and ping pong
        01/11/07
        The ping pong table that once was such a fabulous idea is now taking up 60% of my dining room. The obvious, "What was I thinking?" has now been replaced by "Where is the hatchet?". Thankfully a friend of ours will be here to collect it tomorrow, if I'm lucky. Nice people.

      • Snow day!
        01/10/07
        Oh the joy...OH the excitement...OH the...soggy socks and tracks of mud-laced snow coming through my house....OH the stepping on clumps of snow walking through the kitchen...

        This is what I saw when I knew we might be having a snow day:



        (Little did I know it would

      • Very OUCH, baby
        01/08/07
        I'm reading a blog of a friend of mine and she's talking about very personal things. She expresses gratitude for the friends that have come into her life, and I, of course, am moved to respond. I responded to one, then was typing another and, thinking myself funny, read it to my husband.